Friday, March 27, 2009

I'm going in circles!

SO...what have I been up to for the past few days, you ask? Glad you did, happy to tell you! Let's see....
Wednesday morning I woke up and realized that my right eye kind of hurt. Nothing sharp, nothing very distint. More of just an ache, like a bruise, but kind of behind the eye. Bizarre, but I was also having a bit of a sinusy headache, and rain was making its way toward us, so knowing my barometer self, figured it was all part and parcel of that. Except that Shao did say that night, "Mama, your eye is all red!" Oh...hmm...maybe I should have looked in the mirror at least ONCE today? Yep, all red/bloodshot
Thursday morning...woke up with much more pain...much sharper, more knifelike. Still looked red, hurt to touch the outer eyelid, looked slightly swollen to me. EEEK!!! Oh, my goodness, it hurt! But I stiffened up my upper lip and soldiered on. Thursday was a manic day, work, meetings, Shao had a playdate planned. Tried to figure out just WHEN I could squeeze in a visit to the Dr....but by 9:30, when I got back from my AM run, my eye felt fine, looked fine, except still red a bit, and so I tabled the idea, to see what would happen. It had run like crazy, tears pouring down my face, during my whole AM bus run, so I thought hmm, maybe there was something in it, and now its washed out, and it will be okay. Not so much, come to find out!
Thursday night...about 9:30; Shao's in bed asleep. I am in AGONY. MAJOR shooting pains, so much that they took my breath away. I am frantically trying to decide if I should go to the ER, that's how bad it was. Who would I call to take me? Who would I call to come stay with Shao? Or would I have to wake her up? Too many logistics for a pain-shrouded mind. I practically crawled into bed, and gingerly laid down, hoping the pain would dissipate. It didn't, but somehow I DID manage to fall asleep.
Friday (today) morning...the alarm went off and I jumped...then screamed. The jolt was not good...pain right off the bat, really BAD pain. So bad that I could NOT make myself keep the eye open, it instantly hurt just too much. I showered, dressed, and brushed my teeth with both eyes closed...because closing only the bad one actually hurt too much. Both was better. Finally made myself open it and keep it open...I mean, I was leaving to drive a bus...better to do that with eyes open, eh? It hurt like...you know what...for a few minutes, then began to weep copiously for the next hour, as it did the morning before. And by the time my run was over, voila, it felt pretty good, like the morning before. But I am no fool. No WAY was I gonna trust that it was going to be fine. No way did I want to experience the pain I had that morning, and the night before. SO...
I drove over to my Dr.'s office. I had thoughts of going straight to the clinic/ER, but my Dr likes me to go to them/call them first, then he will direct me. SO...I went to his office (which is on the way to the clinic, anyways.) Mind you, I did not have an appt. But I was not letting that stop me!!! The recep. was nice, and managed to get me an appt in 45 min. So I sat in the waiting room and read magazines, in between resting my eyes.
Finally, I saw the Dr. (not mine, he was booked). Dr. Silva looked at my eye, listened to my story, and shrugged his shoulders. He said it wasn't an infection, but obviously something was going on, and I should go to the clinic/ER!!! URGH! By now, I have to hustle back to the bus yard to drive my Kindergarten run. I tell him this, he tries to frighten me to death, talking about going blind, vs. going to work for 1 hour. Upshot...I just agree with him, leave, pray that God will protect me if I am being foolish, and go drive my run. THEN I head to the clinic.
So I get to the clinic around 1PM. They are a bit busy...oh, goody. Because I have another run to do at 3PM. I finally get back into a room at 1:35. The PA finally comes in at 1:50. I tell him my whole story, he looks in my eyes. He puts something very painful in my eyes, then looks again. Puts dye in both eyes, and looks. Does a pressure test. Looks in my eyes with a hand held light. Makes me put my chin in this cup thing, my head against a bar, and looks in both eyes with another instrument of torture. He was VERY thorough, for which I was thankful. Gets all done...and shrugs his shoulders. No clue what is going on. Wants me to see an opthamologist. Yep, so do I! Calls around to see if he can find one that accepts my state insurance...yep, finds one. AN HOUR AND A HALF AWAY. Who can see me if I come NOW, or else I will have to call for an appt.
SO...I leave and drive like a maniac to get back to the bus yard to do my run. When I get home an hour later I call my Dr.'s office and tell them they need to find me an eye dr. somwhere a tad closer than that! And so now I wait! But just as a kicker, the substitute Dr. that I saw, Dr. Silva, is the one I am again talking to, and again he makes sure I know I could go blind if I don't get help soon. Yeah, thanks...I'm trying. Don't you love it?!? Nightmare, I tell ya, a nightmare!

Okay...so that was my day...and there were some good parts...like the warmish weather (no jacket needed, if you're the hardy New England type, like me! And my girl is in a better frame of mind, which is always a happy thing! :)

Tomorrow we have a big event at Yale University. More about that after the fact! Suffice it say for now it's about being Chinese, and having a Big Sister/Big Brother. I'll explain, I promise!

Blessings...Nancy

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